I'll be kind of surprised if anyone reads this, more surprised if anyone comments, and it'll be hard to believe anyone who says they care.

My life is currently about the equivalent of Latvia's. I'm depressed, starting to become all emo, I cut myself when no one's around in places that my clothes cover up so no one knows (I'm really starting to think Latvia does that), it doesn't feel like anyone really understands me, and I'm fighting a losing battle against myself. It isn't fun...I can tell you that...

My writing skills are crap, and my poetry skills are even crappier, so please, if you care nough to read this, you'll have to get past that.

I decided to write a few yeah.

Happy Mask

It's all so funny if you think about it.

Not the depression, but what habit it brought.

I used to have to struggle to put it on,

But now I just put it on withough any thought.

No one cares about my hurting or pain,

Though sometimes I wonder if they even know.

I must have turned into a pretty good liar,

Because I'm sure my happy mask lets nothing show.

I want to take this awful thing off.

As much as I struggle, it refuses to come off.

Bits will chip away, but none of it ever stays off.

Since you say you're my friend...will you please help me take it off?


Ich brauche nur jemanden, der mich versteht.

Jemand, der wirklich liebt mich.

Jemand, der bereit ist, meine Fehler zu ignorieren ist.

Jemand, der nicht hasst mich, nur weil ich bin anders.

I pray for someoe who will understand me.

I pray for someone who will truly love me.

I pray for someone who won't point out all me flaws.

I pray for someone who will accept me for who I am.

Why can't I find someone who understands me?

Why can't I find someone who truly loves me?

Why can't I find someone who doesn't point out all my flaws?

Why can't I find someone who accepts me for who I am?

Let Me Out

I've been in the shadows for far too long.

I can't even remember the last time I was out.

I can't remember what it's like to be completely happy.

For a long while now, I've been sure I'd be here forever, without any doubt.

I don't wat the darkness anymore.

I just want to be let out.

I want to see the light now.

So just let me out.

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